Marriage is not only a relationship but responsibility Wednesday, 11 May 2011 03:12

Premarital medical tests for couples were introduced in order to avoid certain illnesses or their health status to influence their marriage and to prevent the transmission of diseases to the new generation and for their own safety as well as to ensure the success of marriage.

But will the medical tests alone ensure the success of a marriage? Is the increasing divorce rate among young people caused by the failure of their medical examinations or lack of psychological maturity and understanding of the responsibilities of marriage?

Why do these young people need a psychological test in the first place? A person who does not pass the same must join a preparatory course for marital life in order to teach himself its principles, duties and roles and his young bride must know that she will be the first school and a role model for her children and her righteousness will preserve her home. The life is exposed to fierce currents of volatility, adversity and difficult circumstances. Marital life is not a temporary journey. It is not just a relationship that does not produce the effects which is a burning issue among parents and the entire society.

They must be taught that by getting married, they enter a world of responsibility in all its dimensions and from that moment onwards they have to bear the result of every decision of their lives as it also affects the other. They must also realise that in order to preserve the family they have to give up and sacrifice their own interests as well as gain flexibility and learn the values of reconciliation and the ability to negotiate and compromise.

Perhaps many people don’t realise that some young people of both sexes are kids in terms of thinking. Even though they are literate and professionals, they have a childish behaviour and dependency mixed with selfishness which overwhelms them. Therefore, they do not accept the existence of a partner who has his/her own requirements and rights and complain about the need for giving up some of their habits which are harmful to others. They also do not accept the idea of living for a partner or putting his /her priorities before them.

Family plays a major role in worsening this situation, while the young person of previous generation was keen to bury his marital problems from the sight of his parents either because of shame or not to disturb them or he knew that he will find no encouragement or support. In the current scenario, children discuss their problems with their parents and the case of marriage, quarrels, separation is negotiated through them.

This interference thwarts the responsibility of the spouses and justifies the strictness, stubbornness and persistence in their positions without being subjected to pressure, urging them to step back and rethink their impulses and mistakes. Therefore, divorce became an ordinary matter after a few months of marriage without carrying the distress as the lack of responsibility caused all the things!

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